Giant Fart Cloud Headed Toward St. Augustine, Officials Refuse To Say Who Did It
Meteorologists claim it came from the Sahara, but locals say that sounds exactly like something the Sahara would say.
ST. AUGUSTINE, FL — A giant fart cloud is headed toward St. Augustine this weekend, according to meteorologists who are still insisting on calling it “Saharan dust.”
Officials say the plume traveled across the Atlantic from Africa and is expected to bring hazy skies, lower rain chances, and sunsets that look like the sky got crop-dusted in portrait mode.
When asked who did it, experts declined to assign blame, saying only that “strong winds lifted dust from the Sahara Desert,” which many residents described as suspiciously specific.
The Atlantic Ocean has denied involvement, claiming it merely transported the cloud and “did not ask questions.”
Residents with asthma or allergies are advised to stay indoors, while everyone else is encouraged to enjoy the vibrant sunsets and pretend the entire weekend does not smell like an international incident.
Be the first to comment
Keep it civil. Real names encouraged. We hide spam and slurs.