ST. JOHNS COUNTY, FL — Following a recent Ironman traffic disaster that left residents trapped, furious, and spiritually bonded with orange cones, St. Johns County officials appear ready to explore bold new ways to block access to Vilano Beach.

Tomorrow’s Board of County Commissioners agenda includes a consent item for two Game On Triathlon events at Vilano Beach, scheduled for July 26 and October 11, 2026. The timing has raised eyebrows among residents still recovering from the last major race, also known locally as “the day everyone learned detours can have detours.”

County officials have not confirmed whether the new events will include road closures, traffic confusion, or residents loudly asking why they found out from Facebook instead of literally anywhere else.

Supporters argue the events bring energy, tourism, and athletes who voluntarily wake up at 4 a.m. to suffer in public. Critics argue that Vilano already has enough obstacles, including traffic, parking, beach access, and the emotional burden of existing near a roundabout.

At press time, residents were advised to stretch, hydrate, and begin pre-complaining before all the good comment section jokes are taken.

Source: https://stjohnsclerk.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/05/051926arbcc.pdf